Bee nice

I don't have a fear of them as some folks do, but I give them lots of room and respect. This photo is over a month old. I have not taken any photos in the past week. Just the horses in a field near our house.

On June 26th I posted a story about work. When I was told to clean out the garage on a very hot day. Dirty, hot and lifting heavy equipment is not my idea of a good time. I was short with my boss, I was short with everyone.

About 3 weeks later, he gives me an evaluation. I am thinking my last eval was over 5 years ago. He gave me a bad rap on my manners and my attitude with co-workers. I told him to give me an example. He cited that I was short with him that day. I blasted him. We went back and forth for about 10 minutes. It was not pretty. I signed the eval and was done with it.

I stewed for a couple of days. I considered writing a rebuttal but just thought it would stir things up. It occurred to me later that perhaps he gave me an eval to get back at me for being short with him. Who knows? Like I said it was hot, dusty and I was lifting heavy equipment. A couple of co-workers laughed at me (which I told my boss). My co-worker (a diabetic and recovering from a serious heart attack was the only one assigned to help me). And, they wanted Miss Congeniality? So I was short with him, big hairy deal. One day in 5 years and this is what he bases my eval on?

Besides, the person over his head is the same gal I got into confrontations with in 2005. When she was the manager of another department. She was attempting to manage everybody and I didn't take kindly to it. She got the last laugh, now she is the director over all of us. I've more or less mended fences with her.

I run into this at most every job I work at. I am a good worker. That's why they keep me around. But, I don't kowtow. Insecure managers have a problem with that. And sooner or later I butt heads with them. I am a repeat offender. I do recognize the behavior and I do get better at it with each job. Usually, I move on because my nerves, health and mental well being are affected. I take my job very seriously and I am proud of what I do. When I have to deal with managers like this, I get depressed and wonder why I put up with it. It gets harder to move on every time as you can imagine.

I have to work through it and get through it. I sit every day, every week, every month and watch a co-worker sleep her way through the day. I pointed out to my manager that day of the eval that if he hears any complaints about me not speaking to her, let it be known that if she talks about work, I will answer her every time. But when it comes down to what color or shade do I think she should get for her kitchen counter, sometimes I am not so nice. I let her have it the other day. I told her "I don't care! I REALLY don't!" She sniffled a little bit and picked up all her samples and put them away. This is what she does all day long! She clearly does not have enough work to keep her day occupied. But, she gets all the accolades because she is a mammoth kowtower. We are in a remote office and it is more or less the honor system for us to keep a good work ethic. I know, I know. I have peace of mind knowing that I am doing the right thing. It just builds up and gets to me over the years and I have to purge it out. So, it is out. Move on.

On a side note, I am not a prude. If a co-worker talks to me about home stuff, I listen. But there is a limit and a mature person should know this. I am talking hours here. HOURS of nonstop, chatty, diarrhea of the mouth.

My schools (my clients) have not one bad word to say about me. This is what I base my evaluation on. Co-workers and managers be damned. Peruby may bend a little, but she is not changing. Not now, not in the near future. If you rub me the wrong way, I let you know it. And most of the time, not in a nice way. Get over it. You're a manager for Pete's sake. I figure it was a "pecking order" scenario happening here. He got pecked on and he needed to peck on somebody else to make himself feel better. This chick pecks back.