My favorite part of the movie was....

...THE END! This is about how I felt about Sky Captain. Jude's character mutters "lens cover" and it closes. Thank God. I had trouble swallowing this movie. I have never wanted to scream so much while watching a movie. Scream for it to end. What did my daughter call it? Hard light? I think they tried to make it look mid-1930's or 40's. Something like that. Ah, 1939.

One day, while unrolling a reel of cat5 cable, I marked up the wall in the hall outside of my office. I apologized and asked the custodian to paint over it. I had tried to erase it with a gum eraser, 409, and other things. Most of it came off, but there was still some markings. The cover-up never got done. Not wanting to "wear out my welcome" I covered it up with the following display.



Well, that corner really needed something, anyway.

Coming from out of the speakers: I Hear You Knocking by Dave Edmunds.

Where've You Been?

bold the states you've been to, underline the states you've lived in and italicize the state you're in now...

Alabama / Alaska / Arizona / Arkansas / California / Colorado / Connecticut / Delaware / Florida / Georgia / Hawaii / Idaho / Illinois / Indiana / Iowa / Kansas / Kentucky / Louisiana / Maine / Maryland / Massachusetts / Michigan / Minnesota / Mississippi / Missouri / Montana / Nebraska / Nevada / New Hampshire / New Jersey / New Mexico / New York / North Carolina / North Dakota / Ohio / Oklahoma / Oregon / Pennsylvania / Rhode Island / South Carolina / South Dakota / Tennessee / Texas / Utah / Vermont / Virginia / Washington / West Virginia / Wisconsin / Wyoming / Washington D.C /

Go HERE to have a form generate the HTML for you.

Little Intestine preschool ???

While looking at school closings on the web this morning sans reading glasses, I came across "The Little Intestine Preschool" .

I thought, 'ewww. Sick.'

I re-read. "The Little Einstein Preschool". Oh.

I Can't Believe I did this

This from: Me and My Vampire's blog:

Book Game

1. Grab the nearest book.
2. Open the book to page 123.
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the text of the next 3 sentences on your blog along with these instructions.
5. Don't you dare dig for that "cool" or "intellectual" book in your closet! I know you were thinking about it! Just pick up whatever is closest.

One patient, after what -- as she described it to me -- was clearly consensual sex, said, "I didn't consent to it; he assaulted me." Often hiding this way behind a shield of professional innocence becomes insufficient. Now the individual goes on to become a litigious paranoid individual who publicly accuses his or her presumed victimizer of sexual assault in order to make his or her point clear and his or her position public and therefore more widely known, while simultaneously attempting to get others to share his or her delusion in order to gain consensual validation for the false accusations as well as support along the lines of "There, there, you are innocent, and you deserve justice, and recompense."

Back to me (Peruby):

Oh, my good God. I am so taking this book back to the library tomorrow. I can't read this crap. What was I thinking? That third line was the longest damn line I have ever read in any book. Any book! I am way too lazy to read books where I have to keep looking up the words, such as "litigious"and "recompense". Sheesh!

In all honesty I could have just as easily reached up instead of down, and chose this book:

It had a rag on the end and the boy stood waving the stick in circles.
Another flock of pigeons was flying around in a circle.
One of them left the group to follow the flying rag.

Now, wasn't that much better? Can you tell which book is "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn" and which one is "Understanding Paranoia"? Looks like I don't understand. Not this go round.

Insomnia Sucks!

Here is a photo of my daughter and her friend at the mall after my daughter's latest doctor visit where she got her stitches out. And, the news that more moles are to be removed. I felt the mall was a good place to exorcise that frustration. From the smiles above, I think it worked.

This may also be why her friend did not have the two dollars for lunch the next day. Now, I am feeling guilty for saying anything to her about it. Look at the memories we have in pictures. Sometimes I can be such a schmuck. Or, maybe I was reacting from lack of sleep. I probably didn't get much sleep worrying about my daughter's surgeries.

My daughter wants me to meet her new boyfriend this week-end. She is grounded from the Friday night dance, but she is having T. over on Saturday. I also have a friend coming over from grade school. She is bringing me her computer. From the error message and the sound it is making, I am guessing it is experiencing hard drive failure. I told her that I want to be sure. We will have lunch and visit, catch up. I haven't seen her in a while. Before Christmas, I think.

Then, Sunday I am meeting my other old friend from high school. She is the one who had to move out of her house because it began to slide down the hill from the torrential rains in September. She moved in with her beau of twenty-some years. I wonder how that is going. That would be some adjustment, n'est pas?

Well, I am going to go back to bed and try to get an hour of sleep or so. I have been awake since 2:15 a.m. Why, I don't know. It could be the prednisone. I began taking it yesterday, but have had severe early morning insomnia since the day before yesterday. With Monday being a day off from work for me, I have lost a day. I feel out of sorts. Again, could be the medication. Many side effects. Won't take it long enough to adjust, either. It is a three day medication.

And so, my world turns.

Not your Mother's inhaler

My inhaler is not your normal looking inhaler. The only inhaler I ever saw was the one that Mikey used on The Goonies. I have lived a sheltered life as far as asthma goes.

This inhaler reminds me of the flicker shavers that came out in maybe the early 80's. I am guessing here. Where you used the razor and then turned it for a new one. That is how this inhaler works. You open it and close it after you are done. Snazzy purple, too.

My daughter is angry with me because I grounded her from going to the dance on Friday night. She has Saturday detention. I have never heard of this practice. Is it what the kids had in The Breakfast Club? I didn't watch many movies in the 80's or much television. I was with a guy who liked wrestling. I recall Randy Savage, Jake the Snake, Dusty Rhodes, Andre the Giant, Ric Flair, and last but certainly not least - remember Rowdy Roddy Piper? There is another one, that I can't recall the name of. He was the partner of Dusty Rhodes for a while, but had a serious car accident during his heyday. He was from Chesapeake, Virginia or there abouts.

I found it. Tragic. Magnum TA.

Happy 18th Birthday

My niece turns 18 today. I obtained legal custody of her on January 28th, 2002. She has been with us for three years. I was the first family to see her after she was born. It was instant recognition. It was kind of a jolt that I wasn't expecting when I looked at her as they wheeled her past me. My sister came to stay with me in Chesapeake, Virginia as she and her husband were going through a divorce.

February 22, 1987. Some dates you just never forget. Eighteen years. Eighteen long years. Another lifetime ago for me. Another state, another job, another boyfriend, other co-workers, other neighbors. I spent most of those days as the monkey in the middle between my sister and boyfriend. They didn't get along. Ah, life. Sometimes I drove home from work, wanting to go anywhere but home. My sister vied for my attention and my boyfriend would get angry - go out and get drunk. I am pretty sure my sister did this on purpose. Live and learn.

So, I call up my doctor's office today and tell them I have this lingering cough that won't go away. I had the flu/cold about two weeks ago and all symptoms are gone except this nasty cough. They said to come in at 4:30. I did. My doctor listened and then said one simple word. One I would have never thought of because I am unfamiliar with it. Now, I have been suffering from migraines, acid reflux, indigestion, heartburn, headaches, lingering cough, sensitivity to cigarette smoke, sensitivity to perfumes, and I was thinking of allergies. When she said it. One word. And all the pieces seem to be falling into place:

asthma.

Well. She gave me an inhaler for thirty days and some prednisone. I went home and hit the Internet for information. The only exposure I have had to asthma is a couple of school mates had it and I haven't seen them in over twenty-five years. Hmmmm, let's see. Asthma causes :

1. gasping (I have that from the cough)
2. wheezing (I don't think I have that)
3. chest tightness (I have that and attributed it to heartburn)
4. headaches (oh, Lord yes, I have those)
5. waking up three times or more during the night (have always done that)
6. fatigue (yawn)

Attacks can be triggered by perfume, animal dander, dust, cigarette smoke, cold air, laughing, talking, over exertion, too much heat. This is interesting. I always tried to walk my dog, for health reasons and it is supposed to give you more energy. I was always too embarrassed to tell my doctor that walking made me feel like hell. I thought I was being a sissy. Well, one of the problems with asthma is that walking can irritate the bronchial tubes and makes breathing more difficult. Especially in this cold winter air. And, if anyone has read my blog longer than two weeks you probably know that I despise cigarette smoke and strong perfumes.

Though I don't want to have asthma, it would be some sort of relief if medicine for that ailment will help me with my migraines and the tightness I have been having in my chest. And the gasping/coughing, and the waking up during the night. Oh yes, I hope I can start spelling relief.

The Migraine Monkey

Back to the screaming migraine monkey today. Two days in a row. Haven't had that in a while. I waited this one out too long before taking my medicine. I get six migraine pills a month. That is one prescription. Because of insurance I cannot refill more often than every thirty days. They have not been enough recently. My next doctor's appointment is in March and I am trying to hold off until then so I can talk to her about them and either get a new prescription or an alternative one. Oh, well.

I had a lot to do today and when I am getting a migraine I tend to do my errands or chores very quickly. This is because when I quit or slow down I can no longer ignore the migraine pain. I am also usually sick to my stomach.

Since the schools are closed today I get today off from work. I thought myself rather fortunate that no mom's called me to watch their children today. I thought too soon. I purposely made an appointment with my counselor today just for that reason.

My daughter's friend had been here since Friday at 5 p.m. and her mom called at eleven a.m. today, wanting me to watch the six year-old also. I stood my ground. I had her Mother "P" pick up her 14 year-old at noon and told her "no" to watching the six year old. Enough is enough. My counselor was so proud. She said that people like "P" seek out people like me to use. I am taking baby steps, but I am getting there.

A big No to my sister when she wants to borrow money, even though she makes ten grand more a year than I do; a big No to my half-uncle who wants to spend ten free days at my house each and every summer; a big No to people who want me to watch their kids. No, no, no! It is getting easier. I am trying, people, I am trying.

But, I have another sister who is just as bad as I am. If not worse. She cleans the apartment of an obese friend of her mother-in-law's. She also gets her groceries for her and runs other errands for her. Her mother-in-law keeps hinting that she should be cleaning her house. I am trying to help my sister be able to say "no." It is a sickness. I recognize that I have the sickness and am trying to do something about it. I want to change.

Alfred E. Neuman lives

Just dye his hair red and there you have it. Alfred E. Neuman in the flesh. Am I right or am I right?

Actually, I took this picture in August 2004 at our park. My sister was visiting with her pre-school kids (inner-city). They were a riot. I am very thankful that I only had to spend an afternoon with them. What a handful. This kid reminds me of the character depicted on Mad Magazine.

Answers to Friday's literature fun will be posted in the comment section of this blog. I got attacked by the busy monkey on Saturday and the migraine monkey on Sunday (today). Medicine kicked in around 6 p.m. Then I had to deal with more of the busy monkey and just now am getting the chance to blog. Whew!

Some Friday Literature Fun

Okay. It's Friday and I feel like frolicking. I have come up with some books that were my fav's over the years and I am giving the name of the author plus a picture for a clue. See if you can come up with the name of the book. I will post the answers tomorrow.

I'll do an example.

The author's name is George Orwell. Here is the picture:



Okay, easy. It is "1984"

Here are the rest of them:

1. Richard Powell


2. Sydney J. Harris



3. Nigel Calder



4. Richard Bach



5. William Golding



6. Evelyn Waugh



7. Charlotte Bronte



8. Ian Fleming



9. Wilkie Collins



10. Colin Wilson



11. Karen Blixen or Isak Dinesen



12. Scott O'Dell



Some of the books above are mentioned in my profile as my favorites. Some are not because I didn't think of them when I created my profile. Have fun. I know I did.

Three days

I put a three day limit on company. We are in the middle of the three day stayover with my daughter's friend. My daughter is very annoyed with her. The friend rubbed mashed potatoes into my daughter's face. I thought we were looking at an all-out food fight. My dog was hoping for one. But, the moment passed.



My flowers have stayed fresh and lovely for three days. I had to move them to a high counter in the kitchen because my cats began to eat them. Sheesh!

Today my world is flat

Flat. And full of rage. I do not see anything beyond the horizon. I am so angry, I can't see past the nose on my face. My daughter has to have two more moles cut out on her back and the one needs to be re-done on her ankle. My daughter is angrier than I am. She is fed up with it. She doesn't want to go back. I scheduled for March 22nd. She needs some time in between.

I want to kick and stomp on something. Preferably, something living. On second thought, I couldn't. How about a pillow? Just doesn't get it. I wish I would clean during my anger stages. I would get a lot done. Maybe I will do that this week-end. Store up my anger and turn it into cleaning energy.

My niece got her first check from Social Security that didn't deposit directly into a bank account. Since she turns eighteen this month she begins to get her checks directly to her in the mail. She didn't go to school today. You know what this reminds me of? One of my loser boyfriends that I mentioned in yesterday's post. He would get paid and not go back to work until he had spent all his money in a drunken stupor.

Now, don't misunderstand. I guess I may be exaggerating. This didn't happen every pay day. It did happen more and more, though. I usually had a lot invested into the relationship by this time so that I balked at cutting my losses. Until my senses got the better of me and out the door I went. For good. I was a 'clean slice break up' individual. My sister was a 'saw the relationship apart with a dull knife' person. She kept going back to her exes. I made a clean slice. I never went back. Same way with a job. Once I am done, I am done.

So, how long should I wait until I remind my niece that she needs to pay me rent money? A week, two? I'll say something to her tonight. Her birthday is in 5 days. She graduates on June 3rd.

My daughter's little friend is staying with us for three days while her grandparents are in Arizona. The girl asked me for lunch money today. She had spent all her money on earrings last night at the mall. Here is how she put it:

"Are you supposed to give me lunch money?"

"I am? No one told me to. You spent all your money?" (hell, I don't even have phone numbers in case of an emergency. I had to remind the girl to take her medicine, which I am going to look up on the Internet tonight. I think she is being treated for some form of attention deficit disorder).

"Yeah."

I ask how much. She said two dollars. I hand it over. I repeated that no one told me I was supposed to give her lunch money. I catch her eye in the rear-view mirror of the car. Her eyes narrow.

"Never again," she says. I gave her the look of 'Don't mess with me, sweetheart.'

Memo to myself: "Never again goes for you too, Miss Doormat"

Here there be monsters

I awoke early this morning. An hour before the alarm. Upon awakening, sometimes I have the clearest thoughts about life. My daughter is going through a difficult time with her boyfriend and it brings back many painful memories.

For some reason, I was reminded of a time when I was about twenty-seven years old. I was living in the Virginia Beach area in the mid-eighties. It was a booming time for building. I worked in a lumber company in the office, my boyfriend worked in construction. There was oodles of work. What I didn't know, was the work was seasonal (for my boyfriend).

I recall one very desolate Sunday morning. We were in the process of moving from one small rental house into another with friends. Winter was coming and the construction business had slowed dramatically. A co-worker had given us her old bedroom set and I did not have a way to pick it up. I only had a small Pontiac Sunbird. (God, I loved that car). Bright yellow. Hey, I am straying off the subject.

Anyway, my boyfriend decided he didn't want to look for a truck to help me move the bedroom set. He wanted to party with the couple we were moving in with. We didn't have the money to keep our place. I left my boyfriend with his new friends, and I drove south on route 168 towards North Carolina. I was searching for my boyfriend's old boss who had a truck. I found him at his girlfriend's house (not with his wife). They were drinking and smoking pot. I was depressed and began drinking with them. Since he wasn't with his wife, I didn't want to ask him for the favor of using his truck.

I made my way back sometime later to our old little rental house to continue packing my car and moving things. There was the wife of my boyfriend's old boss at her Mother's house next door to me. She came over to talk to me, and I was a bit wasted. I told her about her husband and his girlfriend. I remember her just sitting on the couch and staring into space. She had suspected him. Now, she knew for sure. My co-worker eventually got the guys in the lumber yard to bring me my bedroom set. I felt defeated, unable to do things for myself. I did not like the feeling.

This was how life was for me in my late twenties. Broken hearts, broken dreams and unreliable men. Total losers. My boyfriend never helped move once. I did all the work. These are the type of men I chose during my twenties. I didn't seem to be able to break the pattern. I appeared to be drawn to my polar opposites. I was too serious, the dependable one. I was attracted to their irresponsibility, their carefree ways, their light and easy living. I wanted some of that.

As I lay in bed this morning thinking about getting up, I tried to drive down that same route. I get to Great Bridge and somewhere the scenery becomes hazy. I have forgotten. I get to a certain turn in the road and - nothing. It reminds me of the old maps when the world was flat. In the margins, where the old time mariners had no idea what lay beyond the borders of the map, they would write:

"Here there be monsters"

Oh, yes. There be monsters alright. Beyond this point in memory are monsters galore. I fear that my daughter is only beginning to draw hers.

Warm and cozy is orange

My good friend painted the walls in her living and dining rooms with a rich, golden orange. Personally, I loved it. This coming from the cool-colors girl. It is so cozy.

I really need to get back to posting real pictures here and not things I just google up. Yecch, that sounds kind of like "throw up". To Google up a picture. Okay, I am putting the camera battery into the charger. Placing the camera right next to my purse so I don't forget it tomorrow.

My daughter gets her stitches out tomorrow evening. She said she heard the doctor say there were six inside and six outside. I just hope that I took care of the incision properly. It does appear to be a bit red around the area. I dread hearing what the doctor is going to say about the odds.

Missing an angel

This is a niece that I don't get to see very often. This photo was taken probably ten years ago or more. She is an angelic child. She is also autistic. The breakup between her father and my sister was not a pleasant one. She resides with her father and his new wife. They are bitter towards my family and are gruff with us when we come to visit or call.

I think of my niece from time to time. She is about sixteen months younger than my daughter. I gave her all our Barney tapes when my daughter had grown tired of them. My niece loved Barney. Most autistic children do.

I got my daughter and niece (the one who lives with me) the pretty popular neck scarves that are the rage these days. The ones that are made out of the softest feather-like material. They remind you of boa feathers. I think they are called magic scarves. They shape into five or so different scarf styles.

I got my daughter a black one flecked with bright colors and my niece a powder blue one. My niece put hers on as a dress and laughed that she would wear it to the prom. They stretch out and then go back to long neck scarf shape.

Jasper keeping sentry

Ha. Lost my previous post, and I don't feel like re-writing it. I, Robot was okay. Reminded me of Planet of the Apes. I am off to my sister's for a birthday celebration and to work on their computer.

Somebody, Pinch Me!

This above picture was taken about an hour ago outside. It is a deciduous bush in front of an evergreen shrub. There is still some snow on the ground, but mostly everything is bare and cold. Not much color, either.

I can't believe that all of this is happening today. First of all, I found a credit card that I thought I had lost. Second, I balanced my checkbook in less than one minute. To the "T"! I was reeling. Then, at lunch I got a call from a friend and my plans were cancelled for Saturday evening. Don't misunderstand, I like to visit with friends; it is just that I wanted a quiet couple of days.

And, this evening I was supposed to work on my brother's PC, but he isn't home. So.... I think I will treat myself to a Pepsi and a movie. I have the house to myself. If you live by yourself, you just wouldn't understand what this means. Remember, I also was the youngest of eight children and to have alone time was like, well, NEVER! I am so giddy my toes are tapping. Well, that could be the chocolate that I ate, too.

My niece walked out the door with Without A Paddle and White Castle, so I am left with I, Robot. I'll letcha know.

Scanning for Spyware

Giving Microsoft's beta version of spyware a go. I have been using it at work for about a week, and just tonight downloaded it to my home PC. I am so glad I don't have any illegal software or download any music illegally to my computer, I might feel a bit nervous. MS is so nosy.

The medical term is dysplastic nevus. Separated, the word dysplasia means abnormal skin growth and nevus means mole or birthmark. So, it all just boils down to abnormal mole. I will wait until I speak with my daughter's dermatologist, but what I read on the Internet means that she is at a higher risk than normal for skin cancer. Sunscreen spf15 or higher on a daily basis and wide-brimmed hats.

I went to my daughter's freshman orientation tonight at the school. Me and a friend made sure to get there early so we could get a good seat. As it turns out they had more people attending than what they ever expected. It appeared that the lecture hall was going to be too small. So, they let all the people who were still standing out in the hallway (the ones who came late) go to the cafeteria. Then, we (the people sitting in the lecture hall) were told to go to the cafeteria. And, guess who had no chairs, now? Bullshit! I ended up getting a coughing fit halfway though the meeting and had to leave anyway.

I feel so - so....so...I don't know what the word is that I want. So pissed about everything. I am irritated with my cough. I despise cough medicine. I am irritated with my co-worker. My daughter is mouthy. She took pre-algebra this year. She is getting B's. She rarely studies. She refuses to take algebra I next year. She is taking General Math. What?! The pre-algebra teacher is teasing her. I just found this out tonight. All my math teachers did this to me, too. We just didn't get math. I lean more towards art, poetry, writing, singing, spelling, and I always liked science. I bit my tongue so many times trying not to tell my daughter that I HATED math so she wouldn't get the wrong impression.

But, I do. I hate it. I hated all my math teachers. If you are a math teacher reading this, do the world a favor. Don't pick on students. You always call on the ones who you know don't have the answer or have the correct answer. We just don't get it! And, this may come as a big surprise to you, but we don't want to get it, either!

And, here's a newsflash! You DO NOT have to be good in math to work with computers. There is plenty, plenty, plenty of computer work to do that does not require the logical side of the brain. Nah, nah, nah, nah nah! Not all computer work involves programming. Most everything is so automated anymore, you don't need those math skills.

Oh, I am just rambling. My daughter just told me at dinner tonight that the pre-algebra teacher always teases her about not speaking loudly enough. She is afraid (as I was) to say the wrong answer. My math teachers would make such an ordeal out of my wrong answers. It was torture! I swear they actually liked to see us squirm. I am afraid my daughter is going through the same ordeal. I don't know if my math teacher liked me (like some boys will tease girls in a mean way, when actually they like them), or whether he really hated me.

I only know that I was thirteen years old. I did not get math. I still don't and now my daughter is going through the exact same dilemma that I did. My sentiment was "just give me the test, I will pass or fail, and then let me the hell out of this class so I can get on with my life!"

I want to take all the math teachers into a room and make them draw a portrait. Then, I want to hold it up for all the class to see and everyone laugh at it. Ha, ha, ha, ha! What is this? A nose? Now, can someone show me what a real nose is supposed to look like? Someone who actually gets art?! Screw it!

Oh, bother. Pooh!

Wireless 802.11g back to Ethernet 802.3

My daughter's Dell True Mobile wireless adapter died a slow death. We have been fighting and fighting with the device for over a month. I thought that perhaps the cable was loose. I had another cable, but no. Then the USB started really flipping out on us.

So I ran a cable down to the basement, plugged it into the wireless router and the other end into my daughter's Ethernet port. Sigh. Worked like a charm. Now, I am going to have to drill a hole in the floor near her pc. Yeah.

But her updates were so far behind. Poor Norton flipped out on me. I was able to grab some of the live updates, and some I wasn't. I will try again later. Someone was going through withdrawal, know what I mean? Sheesh!

A one Mr. Dumbermouth

Back to a previous post about the fire in a nearby city, I mentioned where a one Mr. Dumbermouth stated that the fire department didn't do their job well enough to suit him. I guess he had tons of paperwork that were destroyed. The fire did not reach his establishment until 7 1/2 hours after the initial blaze began. Well, fire is a mean beast and I would have to say the fire fighters were probably more working on the lines of extinguishing the fire and saving lives than covering or moving any paperwork from buildings along the pathway.

At a meeting Monday night, could Mr. Dumbermouth have apologized and humbly retract his accusations made the day of the fire? No. Not him. He apologized and stated that instead of the word inept he meant ineffective and rated the fireman's job a "C". What?! They probably didn't know they were being graded for a test, so they probably forgot to study, huh? This guy is one "dumb" fellow. Or, his mouth is. He should have known when to quit. He should have served himself a big piece of humble pie and used the excuse of excess duress from the trauma.



This is why I opened my XPS on Sunday. In need of a bit of cleaning, I'd say.



Here we are after the much needed dusting. My goodness we sure can accumulate a lot of dust, now can't we?

Hello! I'm dying here!

Omigod! I went to the drug store to pick up some cough medicine. I don't think I have to mention that the cough and cold aisle is the most popular place in the store these days. I was hacking pretty hard.

A lady mentioned something about cough medicine. I mumbled something between hacks.

Lady: My son had a car accident about a month ago and he woke up throwing up.

Me: Hack, hack.

Lady: Well, I talked him into going to the hospital and they began to treat him for the flu.

Me: Hackety, hack, hack. (I walked a step to the right looking at medicine)

Lady: Well, the nurse let him go to the bathroom by himself and we heard him hit the floor....

Me: (Coughing violently about this time. God, is it hot in here? I took another step to the right. The labels were starting to blur. People were stopping to look at me).

Lady: And, then the doctor was right....we thought he had a concussion...

Me: (moving yet another two steps to the right. What do I want? I didn't realize that I had mostly moved out of the cough medicine section. I was pretty much in a full blown coughing fit by now. Doubling over and everything.)

Lady: Blah, blah, blah...(incoherent to me because of the roaring coughing in my ears)

Me: (Why in the hell is she still talking!? Tears streaming down my face, I grab a box of something and tore down the aisle to the cash register.)

Me: (In my mind only)"Hey lady! How about a nice cup of 'Shut the Fuck UP!' "

How do I attract these people? Is it my smile? My face must read "Go on use me as your sounding board. I am a really, really stupid errr... I mean nice person."

I get in the car. What did I just buy? Tylenol P.M.? WTF? Did I mention that I hate cough medicine of any kind. I must have just wanted something to help me sleep.

I came home in such a foul mood, I about killed my cat with my daughter's wallet. It was the first thing I grabbed for. My pets are constantly under my feet. My daughter and I had to spend ten minutes looking for the wallet. She was laughing at me. That brought me back around and I was able to relax. Sheesh.

Another Stakeout - at home

Whilst off from work again for another sick day, I turned on the television. My eyes hurt like hell, but I couldn't lay in bed and let the pain control me. I popped one of my migraine pills, I wasn't sure if it was a migraine or not - didn't feel the usual symptoms.

Lo and behold an hour later, I am pain-free. The medicine is non-narcotic. It is not a pain reliever.

I forgot how much I loved "Another Stakeout". Oh my God, I do so enjoy that movie. I had watched the sequel before I saw the first Stakeout. I think that adding Rosie really made it click. They may have disliked one another in real life, but they sure made it click on the movie set.

I wonder. I watched Rosie's talk show from time to time, I don't know if she ever had any of the characters from that movie on her show.

My older sister emailed me yesterday. She says that she dreads meeting her youngest son's new girlfriend. Her youngest is 27 years old. His latest flame is 34 with a seven year-old son. I tried to remember when I was 34 and thought to myself, would I have dated a 27 year old? And I figured, hell yeah. When I met a guy I liked, I usually didn't think is he too young for me. I still feel like I am 27 years old sometimes. Even in the mornings when I can't get out of bed, I feel like a 27 year old. A 27 year old with a hangover. Ha, ha, ha, ha! Sorrrreeee.

Not good enough!

Thirteen fire departments responded to a fire in a city close to me. My brother's department being one of them. He personally assisted from 6:00 a.m. to 9:30 p.m. that day. No lives were lost. There was a lot of property damage. The buildings were very old. But, according to one property owner - it wasn't good enough! He blames the city's fire department for the loss of his paperwork. They didn't cover it well enough. They didn't remove it when he asked them to go in and do so.

He was the city engineer. Most of his paperwork is duplicated somewhere else in the city. He had just renovated $170,000 worth to his building, but neglected to install a fire alarm. Most of the damage was to his own personal paperwork. Well, what can we say? Let's let him visit for a few days with families that actually lost loved ones in a fire at some time or another. Let's see what he thinks of his paperwork then. Asshole.

My brother does not get paid to be a firefighter. He comes from one of the smaller villages that have volunteer firemen. Sure they get money from the county or the state for the department, but they do not get a paycheck. He happened to be off from work that day. Of course, his job comes first. That is how he provides for his family. But the fire station stuff - no pay. I help him with the computer end of things. They save lives, I save files. Let's put things into perspective Mr. Not Enough.

My daughter got caught in a small web of lies yesterday at her friend's house. Since I was sick she was left to find her own way to the dance and back. Her friend's grandmother said she would pick them up. She was under the impression that I was driving them to the dance. That is what my daughter told her. They walked to the dance. It isn't far. Less than a mile. And, the weather was warm for February. I knew they were walking and I asked her for the umteenth time if she had a way home. "Yes, Mom."

Well, I got a phone call at 10:40 p.m. from my daughter. The dance was closing early because of a fight, they needed a ride. They couldn't reach her friend's grandparents. I immediately jump in my car and retrieve them. They had plans to stay at the friend's house (she lives with her grandparents). They were not home and the doors were locked. I had the friend try calling the cell phone. No answer.

We waited. And waited. About twenty minutes after eleven, the grandparents pulled into the driveway. I had refrained from driving back to the dance place, because we would probably pass on the road and thus would start a big game of cat and mouse.

The grandmother wasn't very pleased, but what could the girls do? They couldn't very well stand out in the cold for twenty minutes. Seems the grandparents had left early to go somewhere and headed straight to the dance afterwards to pick up the girls. I have no idea why the grandmother turns her cell phone off. I didn't care.

Anyway, the grandmother stayed to talk to me in the car while we hashed out the evening. It appears that the grandparents were going out of town for dinner and wanted the girls to go with them. But that would make the girls two hours late for the dance. In comes the lies. My daughter told them that I was taking them, blah, blah, blah. I guess the grandmother just didn't like the idea of her granddaughter walking to the dance. I didn't mind them walking to the dance, my problem was I didn't want them walking home.

Thirteen and fourteen-year-olds and the webs they weave.

Sugar and Spice and all things nice......NOT!

I couldn't resist posting this picture of a little girl I saw at a Birthday party over a year ago. Just browsing through my images on disk and I pick one when I don't have anything special to write about or show.

Still sick. Refused to go anywhere today. Took it easy, but I was burning up. I coughed so much today everything hurts. I gag when I even think about a wild cherry cough drop. Okay, no more lame coffin jokes.

My daughter is at yet another dance with friends, my niece is out with friends and my nephew went to visit some friends for his birthday celebrations.

Me, I finally caught up on some long over-due phone conversations. Silly me, didn't realize that I can't talk very long without spitting and sputtering. The call I just made lasted well over an hour.

D: Guess who I ran into at the hospital?
Me: Give me a clue.
D: She was our co-worker at P's Auto.
Me: D F!
D: Yeah, how did you guess?
Me: Does she still have that Farrah Fawcett hair and that tan?
D: Yes, but boy did she get chubby!
Me: Well, I remember her Mom was very chubby and she looked just like her Mom. But, I always wondered what happened to SH, and EF and SM and DM and so forth and so on.

Then, she had to bring up his name. SM. The one that changed so much after he got a job there with us. When he first started working there he was cute, humble and quite a flirt. After he was promoted to manager he began to change. There was no keeping our office romance a secret. He was the kind of guy who wouldn't sit on the same side of a booth with you. He didn't like any outward signs of affection.

He turned into a real pompous asshole. Still is, from what I hear. He went from a construction worker jeans life to having his pants pressed at the dry cleaners and couldn't get his hands dirty lifestyle. He and I had a relationship like Diane and Sam did on Cheers. My favorite episode summed us up perfectly:

Sam: You're drunk!
Diane: Well, you're stupid and I'll be sober in the morning.

Then my friend and I moved on to the wild and crazy times.

D: Do you remember that time you pulled that knife on that guy?
Me: You tell me about it almost once a year. Honestly, I just remember patches of it.
D: You winked at that guy and motioned him over. He came over and you sweetly asked him if he had a pocket knife. He said sure and gave it to you. You flipped it open and told him "Now get the fuck out of here!"

I can't operate a pen knife. I never even handled one before. I think she gets her stories mixed up. And, this was years before I said the "f" word.

And the corn roasts she would have and over a hundred people would show up. We had to park the cars in the fields next to her house. I would sing at the top of my lungs. What was it? Oh yeah - Barry Sadler's The Ballad of the Green Berets. Good God! Someone should have shot me. And, Johnny Horton's greatest hits. Well, who besides me would have that album in their collection?

Running Bear....loved little white dove....bum bum bum bum.....

Let 'em eat cake!

Ah, here is my daughter's friend's cake she made last week-end. My nephew wanted to know if any one of us had heard of a sifter. Oh, I see. Kind of lumpy powdered sugar, huh? I'll add a sifter to my list. You see, I am not much of a baker and I never really needed a sifter before.



I found my camera. Sable says that regardless of what I am thinking, that she had absolutely nothing to do with it's whereabouts.



And, Casper says that regardless of what Sable says, he didn't have anything to do with the whereabouts of my camera, either. He also wants to know if I have interrogated Precious, yet. Hmmm... me thinks he doth protest too much.



I move on to my nephew's birthday cake. A yellow cake is done and freshly poked holes are awaiting vanilla pudding. Gotta love that smell!



Here we are.. pouring the surprisingly smooth vanilla pudding into the indentations of the cake.



Okay, everyone! Sing with me.

'A dollop, a dollop!' The Cool Whip dollop jingle! Yeah! But, look! There seems to be some left over cool whip in the container. What? No, that can't be.

Less than a minute later.....'what left over cool whip?'

Laughter and giggles and noise, OH MY!

I stayed home from work today, sick. I forced myself to sleep. Took some nasty cold medicine that helped enough to make me sleep.

It was about ten minutes before my daughter was to be home from school. I was laying in bed in a fog. Her incision had been hurting her last night and I was wondering, did she do okay at school? I patted her on the back when she had a coughing spell, and she winced. I felt like a dunce. Her friend did the same thing on the way to school.

I was thinking to myself. "Get up Mom. Get into nurse mode. Take care of your little girl."

The door slams. Running footsteps. Dog barking. What was that? Laughter? Giggles? Most definitely. My daughter and her friend were carrying on like two lost sisters who had not seen each other in years.

Mom: "Your back okay?"
Daughter: "Yep!"
Mom: "Not sore?"
Daughter: "Nope!"

Okay. Mom can go back to sleep. Except for the noise level. They proceeded to break the doorknob on the back door. Mom fixed it. It really wasn't broken. Just stuck. Sheesh. Settle down. Mom stumbles her way back to her lovely, soft bed, kicking aside the used tissue mass on the floor.

I figured it is dangerous to fall asleep with a cough drop in your mouth. So, I stuck a lollipop in my mouth during the night. That fixed my dry hacking cough and I didn't worry about choking in my sleep. Yeah, I got that scratchy throat feeling that forces you to cough every time you try to swallow. Or, breathe even. Must go find more lollipops. I took it out before I got to the tootsie roll center.

Tomorrow is my nephew's birthday. I did not get the cake made today. I am thinking I will be off from work tomorrow also. Maybe I will go in for half a day, come home and bake the cake. Don't know. Too tired to think. Need to call about three friends and one maintenance man. Leak in the downstairs bathroom. Need to build up bank account before calling him, though. I have a few things that need to be taken care of around the house.

Still have not found missing camera. Maybe will stay home from work and clean tomorrow. Better check work email to see if anything pressing came up. Okay. Work email is checked. Nothing pressing happening. Nobody is needing me to be at their school tomorrow. Yeah! Can take another guilt-free sick day. My living room had better cough up my camera. I would hate to think that I have to run out to the store and get a disposable or buy film for my old 35mm. Wow, I wonder where that camera is?

Having cough drop heart burn. They are so sickening sweet they started to hurt my teeth. I get itchy teeth when I get sick. Every dentist I have told about this just gives me an incredulous look. C'mon. I am certainly not the only one who has this symptom?

Hey, cough drops reminds me of a joke I read. It goes like this:

A man was walking home alone one night when he hears a BUMP...BUMP...BUMP... behind him. Walking faster, he looks back, making out an image of an upright coffin banging its way down the middle of the street towards him...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP...

The man begins to run towards his home, and the coffin bounces quickly after him, faster...faster ...BUMP ... BUMP ...BUMP. He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, and locks the door behind him. However, the coffin crashes through his door, with the lid of the coffin flapping ...BUMP...BUMP...BUMP... on the heels of the terrified man.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, the man locks himself in. His heart is pounding. With a CRASH, the coffin breaks down the door. Coming slowly towards him, the man screaming, reaches for something, anything...

All he can find is a box of cough drops!

Desperate, he throws the cough drops at the coffin ...

...and...of...course,

...the coffin stops!

Okay. Am sick. What do you want? Picked up "The Program" by Stephen White at the library today. Thanks to Tabor. Also signed out "Mustang Sallies" by Fawn Germer, "Understanding Paranoia" by Martin Kantor, "Fifty Ways to Protect Your Identity and Your Credit" by Steve Weisman, and believe it or not "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn" by Betty Smith. Somehow I missed reading this one whilst growing up. I'll letcha' know what I think.

Returned Spiderman II. I have to say I skimmed through this one. Kind of predictable. Also returned Garfield and Hellboy. I never did get around to watching them. They are movies my daughter's boyfriend and his brother picked out.

Signed out Dodgeball, Wimbledon and Unstoppable. I may get the chance to watch them before they are due back on Tuesday. I am overdue on visiting my brother and fixing his computer. His floppy drive won't work and I need to show him how to burn his files to a CD. And, how to get rid of those pesky Yahoo toolbars.

Well, cold medicine is beginning to take effect. Off to another drug-induced fit of sleep tonight. More strange dreams, I am sure. Somehow, I can't remember them. I used to have such vivid dreams, I kept telling myself - start writing them into stories. But, I never did. What a shame.

Spellcheck is funny. It wants to change Spiderman into subterranean, Hellboy into elbow, Dodgeball into deducible, and Wimbledon into ambled. And, get this. It doesn't even recognize the word Spellcheck. It wants to change that word into splices. WTF?

Sure, go ahead - cut my daughter

My little girl - about nine years ago.





Not exactly what I wanted to do. Give someone permission to cut my daughter. This picture was taken about nine years ago. Doc, this is my "little girl!"

I signed the paper.

"Yes, I give you my permission to take a scalpel and cut a piece of skin out of my daughter's back. Sure. And, I will even pay you to do it. Or, well, my insurance will."

Another mole. A pigmented spot on human skin. When she was little I would tell her that the mole on her ankle bone was a beauty mark. I think she believed me. In many countries it is considered a beauty mark. Now, she has a scar there. And, many on her back. I know they will fade in time, but not if they keep cutting more of them.

I wish it had been me on the examination table instead of her. I wish I were the one with moles that need to be removed and sent to a lab. I would trade her half a dozen moles for a hundred on me.

The doctor: "Are you doing okay, Mom?"

Me: "Sure. Just fine. Can you use the navy blue thread like the last surgeon did? It looks so pretty against her pale skin. Do you mind if I take a scalpel for myself? I would like to twist it into my gut about now."

Then, to come home and my daughter calls her boyfriend. He had no idea she was having this minor surgery today. He wanted to know if she could go with him Saturday to a regional wrestling match. Overnight - out of town - in a motel room. He and his family. Mom, Dad, brother and sister, and my daughter. All of them in the same motel room.

Me: "Excuse me? I thought you said the same motel room. "

Daughter: "C'mon Mom! It is NO big deal. Don't you trust me?"

Me: "Trust you? Of course I do. It wouldn't be sending the right message to you." (I am borrowing my counselor's words, here)

Daughter: "Boyfriend's Mom wants to speak with you."

Sheesh. Isn't it enough for one evening that I just survived minor surgery with my daughter? Why do I have to justify my answer to my daughter's boyfriend's Mother?

Me: "No, she cannot go and stay in the same motel with you and your family. Excuse me, I do trust you, but I would like her to heal from this ordeal and I would like to watch over her this week-end. Yes, I am sure she would like to go and I thank you for inviting her. Sorry, I just cannot allow it."

Hang up.

Daughter: "You don't know how I will be feeling this week-end. I'll be fine."

Me: "Daughter dear, that is only part of it. I will not allow you to spend the night in the same motel room with your boyfriend and family. Finished. Non-negotiable. Neeeexxxxxttt!"

Call me the Mom-Nazi. (As in Seinfeld's The Soup Nazi) The End.

Misplaced my camera

I can't find my camera. I took pictures of a chocolate bundt cake that one of my daughter's friends made and I set the camera aside. I have searched all over for it. Has anyone seen it?

I can't say or think of the word bundt without thinking of the movie My Big Fat Greek Wedding. "Bunnt?" "Bunt!" "Bunn?" "Bunnndddttt!" Of course I would post pictures of it, but....hmmm.. where could it be? The dog? Maybe. I wouldn't be surprised. She has cost me that much, already.

My nephew turns 28 this Friday. I asked him what kind of cake he wanted. He chose this one:

1 yellow cake mix
1 large package of vanilla instant pudding
1 large can of crushed pineapple
1 large container of cool whip

Bake the cake, let cool. You can add a package of pudding to the cake mix before baking it. I like to poke holes in the cake after it has cooled with the handle of a wooden spoon and pour the pudding (after I make it) over the cake, so that it seeps into the holes. I also put a layer of pudding on top of the cake.

Drain the pineapple. Spread the crushed pineapple over the vanilla pudding. Top with cool whip. Refrigerate and serve cold. It is refreshing on warm days. It reminds me of my sister-in-law's punch bowl cake. She makes it with strawberries and layers it in a punch bowl. Very festive.

I bought him a very nice charcoal grey dress shirt with a gorgeous matching tie. He has to dress up for work. Oracle database manager. He likes the dockers stain defender material. Arrow is also making stain resistant clothing.

He also wanted a portfolio or a padfolio to keep his papers, certificates and resumes nice. I found one at Staples. I bought myself an Ott-Lite for reading. Thanks to Tabor, I now have a book to look forward to. At least I will be reading something other than a computer book.