Dress codes

This is an older picture of how my daughter wears her hair when she gets the red dyed into it. Her home school did not even blink when she showed up with it. Probably because they had gone through a controversial situation with a girl with purple hair about two years ago. I don't know.

Since my daughter had downsized to two colors over the summer (black and blond) when she returned to the red last week, the blond was porous enough to grab some of the red and turn a bit pink. In April we went to Cincinnati to see "The Lion King" on stage and her hair had a pink hue to it then. This photo below is my second favorite style for her to wear her hair. It may be close to my very favorite.

Unfortunately, her hair is not that long and she does not have near the same amount of blond covering the red/pink as she did in this photo.

I can attest to the fact that she gets a compliment a week on her hair if we are out and about. People make a point to walk up to her and tell her. A lot of times they are women my age or older. This makes her feel good about herself.

I looked the rules up at this Career center on line last night. My daughter told me that a couple of teachers she talked to on Friday said that they did not have any problem with her hair. The teacher of Graphics Arts is the problem. And she is only the teacher for the Juniors. The guy that teaches the Seniors told my daughter he did not have a problem with her hair.

The rules are printed as:

Makeup must be of a natural color or tone. Hair color must be an acceptable color as deemed by the administration. Unusual hair is unacceptable.

We have received nothing in writing. The teacher spoke to my daughter. There are nine individuals listed under Administrative staff at this school. It does not specify that the color of hair is considered on a class per class basis. So, this means the lime green and bright pink that the girls are wearing to cosmetology class will have to go if my daughter's has to go. Or, they can be accused of discrimination.

When my daughter mentioned the cost factor to her teacher, the teacher said "Aw, that's so sad." Then she said "Our Cosmetology department will do it for free." My daughter was not amused. My daughter told me that she had been talking to one of her classmates at lunch and asked "What does she want me to do, shave my head?" The classmate told the teacher and I guess the teacher said "I would like to." I guess the teacher came up to my daughter later in the day and said "I meant that I would like to shave my head, not yours because I can't do a thing with mine." Hmmmm.

My daughter also told me that the teacher told her she had a customer scheduled to come in that day but since she saw my daughter's hair at orientation night, she cancelled the appointment. Why would she schedule a customer to come in when the Juniors were going to play games all day Friday and were not going to do any work? It was the first day for crying out loud. The Seniors don't start until Monday. And, don't you think the Seniors would be more apt to work with potential customers than the Juniors who don't even know what they are doing, yet? To me this was a blatant effort to make my daughter feel bad.

So, what is it I want to teach my daughter? That is where the problem lies. If we fight this thing and she gets to keep the red hair, how is that going to lay the groundwork for the relationship between her teacher and herself for the year? Pretty ugly if I know human nature to be what it is. I am also picking up bad vibrations from the way this teacher speaks to my daughter.

My first instinct is to fight it. If we win, then change the hair color to a more normal one. If we don't win, she will have to change it regardless. I didn't sleep very well last night. I have a big family get together today 200 miles away. It is going to be a long day, but at least I will get to discuss this subject with my sisters who are older and wiser about kids and school conflicts than I. And,, by that I mean that they learned the hard way. Two of my sisters were school teachers. They went a couple of rounds with school staff in an effort to fight for their kids. Was it worth it? I think they may regret it and I will find out today.

I also have at my disposal a wealth of advice from my colleagues. There is another career center in another county that I work with. I can get advice from them. I personally work on friendly terms with two of the nine administrators listed at our career center. Not that I want to ask for any favors from them, but I can get their advice on the situation. One of them I am quite close to.

I know what my Mom would have done. She would simply say "Change your hair." And, that would be the end of it. Sigh. Sometimes I feel like such a rebel but not in a good way. Other times I feel like I have a problem with authority. But, who doesn't from time to time? The main issue for me is "Are they being fair, or is one person just being difficult?" Then if that is the case, am I myself being difficult? And again, I want to scream out "Aren't the Arts supposed to be a display of creativity and originality?" Do I want to suppress that talent in my daughter? Hell, no! This is the part of me that gets fired up and says to myself "Hell or high water, we are going to fight this thing!" Then the little voice comes creeping in (probably my Mother's, LOL!) "Don't make waves. Go with the flow. It will be easier on you that way. Less stress."