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And may your New Year's be bright!

Christmas Past

1966

Christmas for the young is a magical time. You have no idea where the presents come from. Whether the North Pole or from Treasure Island, you just relish in the moment of opening them and the glory of getting stuff.

Where does it turn ugly? For some, it never does. For others, depression sets in and suicide incidents skyrocket. The Christmas years that I felt depressed I can probably count on one hand and have fingers left over. Nothing major. I just feel for those that cannot pull themselves out of the overall monstrosity of the holiday. The never ending expectations.

Christmas is a time for giving. Have they nothing to give? Do they think that everyone wants a material gift from them? I am trying to recall the holiday that I was depressed the most. I am thinking it was a time in my life where my life was in a stalled situation. I wasn't sure of where I was going and I was trying to leave the past behind.

When you feel like a nothing inside, I guess you feel like you have nothing to give others. I was at a point where I had no partner in life, my working life was in limbo and friends were scarce. You are too old to receive gifts from family and you have no money with which to purchase gifts or even contribute to the holiday meal. You feel empty inside. You look around and you see all these happy faces and you wonder why you don't feel the same way. It also could be that I was still immature and selfish inside.

When I had a child of my own and I became responsible for the joy on another's face, the event held so much more for me. To be able to create an atmosphere in my own home that would hold joy for others became so much more important to me. During the year, I put my nose to the grindstone and whether I liked my work or not, it paid the bills and gave me something to look forward to in the way of family vacations and holiday cheer. I grew up.

I don't think that anyone in this world can escape a blue Christmas from time to time. It is realizing the fact that they are not all that way and time marches on that we need to focus on and remedy the situation that made us depressed in the first place. I truly wish that those in the throes of their depression could be given a crystal ball and they could see themselves in some future holiday where things are much brighter and cheerier. A time to look forward to. For those in need, this is my Christmas wish. That they are filled with hope and can lift their heads up and march into the new year with renewed spirit and confidence.

Out of the misty fog an arm stretches out. You don't see a face, just an arm and a strong hand to grab yours and pull you out of your dense misery and give you a step up. Look up, take a deep breath and push forward.

Oh, upon re-reading this it sounds so sappy! Can you tell that I am going to go and visit friends today? Some happy, some sad. I want to help the sad one. The one who is dealing with loss and sickness this year. Although knowing her, she will probably be so darn cheery, I will feel like the depressed one. She is a survivor, but I want her to know that I am there for her. Sometimes, the cheer can be a facade.

Oh, that's me on the far left squeezing the life out of that baby doll.

Glares, pricks and burns

Floral craft

My eyes are still store from all the camera flashes over the holiday. I have pricks and small cuts on my fingers from wrapping presents, cutting silk flower wire and burns from the glue gun and baking.

I worked Wednesday, off Thursday and I work today. Crappy, I know. The job on Wednesday was such a disaster (not on my part), that the school co-ordinator cancelled the entire show. Except for my part. He still wants me to come out today and upgrade his switches. Fun stuff. I get to follow a custodian around to all the schools because they are locked up for the holidays.

The nice part about this is, nobody is around. I just go in, do my stuff and walk out when I am done. That is, if all goes well. You never know when you blow the config away if you can put it all back together. There is always one little piece of equipment that has to trip everything up. Snarly little buggers, I want to tell you.

Then I am off work again until next Wednesday. This week-end I get to fix food. Thank heavens for slow cookers/crock pots. What a blessing. You just mix the food in and forget about it for hours. You can go shopping, watch a movie (I am hoping to watch Devil Wears Prada), clean house - when you are ready to eat, there it is! Gotta love it. I have purchased shrimp for New Years eve. I have pork and sauerkraut for the New Year day, but very little. (Not our favorite stuff).

Sigh. I guess you know that you are getting old when the food is more important than the alcohol. Did I get any alcohol at all? No. I still have bottles of stuff from three to four years ago. What a lush!

Peek-a-boo

There's a boy in there somewhere!

A little friend of the family appears to be buried underneath his small mountain of gifts this Christmas. I am thinking he made out pretty good.

Watched a movie this evening. I really, really DON'T recommend it! Friends with Money. I really, really don't get this movie. What was it about any way? Did some Hollywood producer decide to create a movie that says "Let's make a movie that shows how stoned Jennifer Aniston can be?" Okay, I am using the word "really" a bit too much, but I can't help it. I am at a loss for words, here. If I am missing the point, somebody please point it out to me.

Wait. I just read where the writer is one who has written for Sex and the City, Six Feet Under and Gilmore Girls. Nuff said. Fluff. Smoke it up, then.

Wrong setting

Lights on the tree

I had the camera set wrong when I took this shot. The white lettering on top of the camera knob has worn off and I can't tell what I have it set at and if I don't have my glasses on, I can't see the setting show up on the display window. I kind of like it.

I had a wonderful Christmas. I didn't do much yesterday except go through bags and bags of wrapping paper to make sure nothing was thrown out. I saved one little make-up mirror from the garbage.

I won ten dollars from a lottery ticket. I don't much care for the lottery, but when somebody hands me a ticket, I'll scratch it!

Back to work today. I am tired.

Merry Christmas

Silver ornament from my tree

I hope this Christmas morning finds all of you well and happy. If not happy, at least content. If not well, hopefully on the road to recovery. I am hoping that everybody got all they wished for and more. That each one of you took a moment to relish in the atmosphere and the spirit of having loved ones close to you. This is what Christmas has been for me this year, and though I know that not every year can be like this, I just hope and dream that nobody feels left out or lonely this holiday season.

What today feels like

Today feels like I am standing at the bottom of this huge tree, looking up. See that top way up there? My goals are sitting up there. I have to start climbing. Get ready, set, GO!

Drunks in the basement, bats in my belfry

A red ornament

It appears as if I am going to get the three things I did not want for Christmas. The list I posted a couple of days ago. Paper cuts, kitty vomit and drunks in the basement. Check, check and.... check.

I don't have the heart to continue what I was posting the night before, or the middle of the night. As I stated at the beginning of the post my head was fuzzy as cotton and I was just rambling.

I just have a hard time helping people who drive nicer cars than me, have nicer clothes, and nicer nails. I don't want to judge but I was raised to question things. This is why I have such a difficult time at work. I was never the type to just do the job and shut up.

I get a manager who wants me to do as they say and don't ask questions. I have a problem with that. I speak my mind. Sometimes. I get into hot water. I get written up for insubordination. I tell them to shove the job up their arse and I walk.

Then I had a child and I found that I had to curb my sarcasm a bit in order to provide a stable home life for us. I found out that the job ain't so bad after things smooth over. I found out that the sarcasm problem follows me to every damn job I go to. Huh. Imagine that.

I found out how to adjust my attitude so that my life became easier. I still have a bit of a problem now and again with the "insubordination" part, but I stand my ground.

Life is a bitch sometimes, but I like myself and I am too damn tired and too damn old to keep starting over. I figure anymore if I walk, who wins? Me or them? Hmmmm.

However, I usually walk when I lose respect for my boss. They lie. I hate that. They say they are going to help you and all they want to do is to help themselves. If you are not there to help them look good, then you are the enemy.

I find fault with the organization. I am not a Pollyanna who can pretend that my organization is the greatest thing since sliced bread and that it can do no wrong. Hell, we are a mess. It is hard to wait for sometimes, but usually they hang themselves. They trip themselves up in their own lies and false pretenses.

Sometimes I get tired of seeing customers laugh at my boss and my organization. Well, mostly they get frustrated and mad. It is hard not to get depressed about it. I just try to do the best I can. It can be exhausting trying to make up for what the upper management screws up. I had to learn to stop trying to fix things I didn't mess up. I still try sometimes, but I keep reminding myself to make life easy on myself and just do what I can do without killing myself.

Hmmm. I guess I am still tired and my head is still full of cotton. Look at the garbage I just wrote. Sheesh! I better get some rest before I spin another yarn.

The good, the bad and the ugly

Ornament, camera, reflection

So, this is what I get after two days full of running and drop exhausted into bed at 9:30 p.m. at night. I am wide awake at 12:30 a.m. Unable to fall back asleep. My head is full of cotton. I am not sure I can be held accountable for what I type here today. I'm not sure I am in my right mind.

For work yesterday (I think that was Thursday) I did a lot of driving. My mind kept returning to the evening prior (Wednesday evening). This was the night that I attended the Christmas party for the families that the city police department gave. Not my city, one north of where I live. They let the children open one gift and serve them a nice hot meal and sing carols, Santa comes, etc... I had the task of serving the turkey.

What I am about to say is not meant to be "Politically incorrect." It is just an observation on my part. I was uneasy asking "Would you like dark or white meat?" to a room of folks where some were black, some were white and some were both. I stopped asking and just put turkey on their plate. It just sounded wrong. We are all afraid of saying the wrong thing.

The Good, the bad and the ugly.

The Good:

The little children were adorably sweet and they were fed, given one present to open at the party and got to sit on Santa's lap.

The bad:

So many of the adults wore professionally fake fingernails, beautiful make-up and dressed to the nines. So many of the children roamed around without supervision. I gravitate toward children so I had a few on my hip almost all evening. I had no idea who the parent (or guardian) was and no one seemed anxious to retrieve their child. A couple of times we had to shoo them out of the kitchen because we were using some pretty sharp knives to carve the turkeys.

The ugly:

You could see where some of the other adults had led a rough life of poverty. It showed in their faces. Missing teeth, dull hair, sunken eyes. Aged beyond their years.

I had an extra ordinary stressful and busy day at work on Wednesday. This gave me no time to go home and freshen my make-up or re-do my hair or change clothes before dashing off to the party that evening. As I served the food I felt dowdy, tired and stressed out. I was envious of the women who had the professional nails done and their make-up was glowing and their clothes were shiny and glittery. I am a little sore on the subject of fake finger nails. I like them as well as the next person. I was always angry when one of my sisters would boo hoo about her monetary woes and in the next breath she would rave about her newly manicured fingernails. When pressed to comment on how much the nails cost, she shut up about her problems pretty quickly.

I was glad to participate in the event. I took the Tickle Me Elmo Extreme in case they needed an extra gift. The officer in charge told me that everything was planned out, all children were taken care of. I may just return the darn thing to the store.

Then came the article I read. Drat! About how to be careful around the holidays. Most of your money and donations do not make it past the folks collecting. This is why the officer wanted the folks who donated to attend the party. They could see where their efforts went. This is an important step to charity.

A few weeks back I had purchased a gift for a little girl. It was a beautiful purple horse head that the little girl (or boy) could add make-up to and style the mane. (I will always love to buy little girl gifts!) I missed the giving tree at one of my banks and dashed around to find a place that had NOT stopped collecting. (As some of you suggested to give Elmo to a toy drive, it is way too late for that. They need time to wrap and distribute the gifts). I found a box for the horse head gift at a Dollar General store. I dropped it in, and went through the store picking up a few things. When I checked out I came close to the box. The cashier quickly told me that the gift had been taken into the back room because they didn't want anybody to grab it and run with it. I believed her. After the article, I wonder.

A decade or so back, I was sitting at a party. I overheard a worker at a Good Will store bragging about how she got first dibs on whatever came into the store. Now, this worker was not mentally challenged as most think Good Will employees are. Not at all. She was sane, her husband made good money and she had no children to purchase for. Good Will is "supposed" to place the articles on the sales floor for 48 hours "before" the employees get the opportunity to purchase them. Forget that. From this gal I heard about money she pulls out of pockets and sticks into her pocket. It was supposed to go to the store jar for all to share or go towards their holiday party. They do this sorting in the back room of the stores. Note that not all stores operate in this manner. It just turned my stomach.

Some of the people who don't work have the time to visit second hand stores and to be on hand when their new shipments come in. They visit often and get the best deals. People who work all day, do not get the chance to browse that often. Result: resentment.

To be continued: (Unless I get well rested and am able to monitor and actually think about what I am typing here!)

Willy Nilly

My tree this year. All willy nilly.

I kind of just threw stuff on it this year. I didn't get a live tree. I purchased one from Tis the Season. It was their last one and it has white snow on it's branches. I wonder how long that stuff will last. Somebody said "You will need to re-spray it." I'm thinking to myself 'You can do that?'

I normally don't do things on a whim. The season kind of sneaks up on you. I made a purchase that I have absolutely no use for. I got caught up in the excitement. I purchased a Tickle Me Elmo TMX. The Warning version. I happened to be in the right place at the right time. I was in a toy store and somebody had just returned it unopened. The clerk asked me if I wanted it, I said "Sure." And, I bought it.

Now, what the hell do I do with it?

A Christmas Tag

I was tagged by:

One day at a time: Tabor.

"The Rules:

The player of this game starts with "3 things he/ she would love to get for Christmas" and also has to list "3 things he/ she definitely does not want to get for Christmas". Then he/she tags 5 friends and list their names. The ones who get tagged need to write on their blogs about their Christmas wishes, as well as state this rule clearly, then tag 5 more victims. And the one who tags need to leave a comment that says "you've been Christmas tagged!" in their comments and tell them to read your blog."

Three things I would like for Christmas:

1. My daughter's kiloid to dissipate

2. Peace in my family/household

3. Someone to clean my house


Three things I don't want for Christmas:


1. Drunks in my basement

2. Kitty vomit

3. Paper cuts from wrapping gifts

LOL! I have been so busy with other things, I never really sat down to figure what I really wanted this holiday season. I will be very surprised it I get number three from the first list and if I don't get number three from the second list!

Writing on the wall

My cards from last year

Greeting cards. Is it a dying tradition? A passing fad was the one page newsletter about what the family did throughout the year. I don't receive any of those any more. I used to get about three a year. I kind of lost contact with the folks who sent them out, so maybe they still do.

There are religious cards (usually the nativity), scenic cards (snowy country setting with church or cozy house), cutesy cards (little critters and such), shiny and satiny ones, ornament ones, Peace, Happy Holidays, holly and ivy, birds, snowmen... just about anything you can think of has ended up on a Christmas card.

Is it a waste of money? A waste of paper material? Do you purchase recycled cards? I have. Not every year. I have also purchased ones that contribute to the welfare of pets. Card companies make a killing. There are always shelves of cards left over after the holiday. Do they save them for next year?

Do you add a personal note or just sign your name(s)? I receive a few pre-printed cards with the family names printed neatly inside. Do you print your addresses from a computer and stick them on the envelope? Does this take away the personalized feeling of a card?

Do you include confetti inside your card? The recipient opens it up and a cupful of stuff falls out and onto the floor. Then they shake their fist in the air! "Why that dirty so and so! Now, look at the mess I have to clean up!" Nobody likes confetti inside a card. Nobody. Stop it. Send a lottery ticket inside a card if you have to put something inside it. LOL! Just kidding.

I don't participate in the state lottery. And, I especially don't participate in chain e-mails or letters of any kind. I've had a few people angry with me because I broke the chain. I tell them I don't do that sort of thing. I am not overly religious. I just don't believe in them. There just seems to be something wrong about it.

Of course there is a reason I don't participate in chain e-mails. Because I have to try and un-clog bogged down networks. Especially when we get an e-mail storm. Too much traffic causes congestion. No matter if it is cars or Internet packets. Why is your connection so slow? Because somebody somewhere is forwarding that last joke to everyone in their contact list and it has a "ripple effect". I'm not saying don't send any more jokes. I love a good joke.

I just remove all of the junk out before I send the joke and I only send it to people I think will appreciate the joke. If you receive a letter in the postal mail, do you re-stuff the original envelope into the new envelope before you re-send it to your friend or relative? No, of course not. And, can you imagine how big this letter would get by the time twenty people re-stuffed the letter without removing the envelopes that contained their address? Adding packet after packet on top of the previous e-mail causes the entire message to grow and grow and grow. Until it is an actual elephant trudging through the backbone of the Internet. Now, multiply that by years of people sending and re-sending the same jokes. Pretty soon our networks won't move at all.

1964

On the front porch swing

I am guessing this is 1964. Could be '65. That's me in the middle - in yellow. I look like I have two bananas in my hair. I guess the barrettes were a little too big for me. LOL! I think also that I am holding my dress down around my legs so as not to show any panties in the picture. That would be disgraceful!

Prison dryers

I have no photo today that would depict the anger I am feeling. If I were this guy, I would be giving the judge back the $75 used to bail me out of jail and beg to be let back in. If not, he had better be hiding, and hiding well. I can only imagine if he were in my neighborhood. I'd lead the mob of angry villagers to lynch him up.

So, how big are the dryers in prison? Yeah. We'll see who wets their pants, now.

A daisy wheel

Cute wheel cover

One of my first office jobs, I used a typewriter with a "daisy wheel". It wasn't like this. I thought this was a cute Volkswagen beetle. A daisy wheel cover on a popsicle green bug. This person just has to be full of sunshiny happiness.

Gushing gutters

My neighbor's house through a downpour

No snow to speak of yet. It is mild enough to rain. This photo is from the past summer. Before I discovered my gutter wasn't clogged. It had just pulled away from the roof and just needed pounded back in.

Do you have a real "Sad Sack" that you work with? I have worked with some. This is the guy who can't get anything right. No matter how many times you tell him something, he can't seem to remember it or get it straight. He keeps typing in the wrong numbers. When you call for support and get him, you groan. No, not "Sad Sack!" He can't do anything right. Sometimes he would make me so mad and other times I felt so sorry for him.

He's the one that if it wasn't messed up before he touched it, it is beyond help after he is done with it. The buzz around the office was "Never let Sad Sack touch your computer equipment! It will never work right again!" He would hand it back with some lame excuse that somebody else messed it up or it was messed up when he got hold of it - and it wasn't. He messes almost everything up.

Know the type? Okay, now imagine he is your manager. How in the hell did that happen? Of course that might say a lot about managers in some work places.

Just blabbering

Vivid orange

I put some lights up around the outside bushes this evening. The first set of net lights out of the box didn't work. Great start! I strung a bunch of single strands together. I put way more than three on one line. They look okay after dark. Somebody (we suspect the pizza man) stepped on one of the bulbs and put an entire strand out that was close to the railing. I'll replace it. I have one strand running across the sidewalk to connect the bushes and I covered it with a rug. I should have wrapped them in bubble wrap.

I'll go tomorrow and get more outside extension cords. I can't find my old stuff. I figure by the time I exhaust and frustrate myself by looking, I could have purchased new stuff.

Well, I am down to three cats. Precious went back to my sister. A couple of years ago when she divorced and moved into a small house, she was not allowed pets. She said that the one cat was calm and quiet and could stay in an upstairs bedroom, but she felt that Precious was a little too high strung so I took her in. She purchased her own house a month ago and I took the cat back to her.

We had a houseful of teenagers this evening kicking it to Dance Dance Revolution (a Play Station 2 game) and the temperature in the living room rose to about 74 degree Fahrenheit. My poor niece stays in the basement and the furnace did not run all day so it is quite chilly down there. I need to have the gas fireplace checked so I can run it this winter for her.

I was front seat to another Jerry Springfield episode of Catholic Religion 101 again this morning. Usually on Mondays the two co-workers talk about their service they went to over the week-end. I went downstairs to get a cup of coffee. When I came back upstairs the big guy (head honcho) of the building was in the middle of the conversation. I groaned "Oh no! Not you, too!" He said "They are talking religion." I said, "I know! That's why I left." He said his grandmother always told him to never talk religion or politics. I said, "Oh yeah? My Mom told me it was religion, politics and sex!" He laughed. We were more interested in their passionate input of the conversation that what they were actually discussing.

He dragged his employee out (almost literally). The two employees were yelling at each other "You're wrong! I'm right!" Man the room was hot after that. They sure were fired up. I think they remained friends through all of the screaming. It was apparent to me (an observer) that neither one was really listening to what they other was saying. They were much too intent on shouting over what the other was trying to say.

I never could stand talk shows like that and I hope this brings an end to the arguing. I can pretty much guess that the big guy talked to his employee and told her that this sort of office babbling needs to stop and needs to stop pronto. My co-worker? I label her a religious quack! She was still yelling at the other employee as she was being dragged away by her boss "Remember, that this religion stemmed from the Catholic religion!" She watches television evangelists Joyce Meyer and Joel Osteen.

The tree is up

First artificial tree in this house

This is the first year I don't have a live tree since we moved to this house in March of 2002. I am in no way fastidious when it comes to decorating for the holidays. As long as it has color and plenty of glow I'm pretty happy. So I don't much care if the wires of the lights are showing or not.

I almost hit a deer on the way home from a dinner last night. If I opened my car door he could have walked right in. Except for the fact that I was going 60 mph. He was just strolling. That is a good thing because if he were running, I'd have nailed him. There were two cars coming in the opposite direction so I had my headlights dimmed and did not see him until I was within inches of his nose. My reflexes caused me to swerve anyway. It was a bit unnerving.

My niece told me today that a classmate of hers shot himself Friday night. He came home from a party, called his grandfather, told him he loved him and shot himself with a shot gun. He died last night. She had not seen him in over a year so she was not sure how his mental condition was. I had just read in the paper this morning how depressing the holidays are for some folks and how SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) affects the 20 to 30 age group the hardest.

It just seems like the world events are taking their toll on folks this year. I am not sure if it was the nice batch of warm weather we had or if people need to really express themselves this year, but there sure are a lot of light displays. We drove around tonight and looked at some. Some folks like the religious theme. Others like the Santa and reindeer. Still others do the snowmen or Rudolph and the Abominable snowman. And of course there is the Grinch or the Peanuts gang. They are always popular. Trees, trains, stars, wreaths, pointsettias - so much to choose from. Palm trees are big this year. I like the snowmen. I may go with that theme some year. You know. When I have all this extra money to spend on decorations.

Some girls I used to work with, get together every month or so to play cards or sing along or just visit. We adopted a family this year from the Sheriff's office. They don't get the parents any presents. Just the children. There are two. An 11 year old girl and a six year old boy. I am covering the boy. He likes Spiderman. It has been ages since I bought little boy clothes (if ever?). We have to use a credit card. This way we can give a gift receipt with the item and the parent(s) cannot exchange the item for cash. They must exchange it for merchandise. Wow. I prefer to help out strangers. This way I don't know why they don't have money to buy gifts this year. Even the thought of a parent returning their child's gifts for cash for themselves makes me shake my head in dismay. It never ceases to amaze me.

Well, it's off to starting another work week. This December is going to be c-r-a-z-y! We are connecting a dozen schools via fiber this month. This means about 2 dozen less T1 lines to troubleshoot. Yippee!

Little blue bird

I think her name is Shelby

This little girl dressed in blue was at my Grand niece's first birthday party back in October. Cute as a button and dressed all in blue to match her pretty eyes.

I sat at the mall waiting on my nephew this evening when my feet felt as though they were going to fall off. I looked up and there was this huge line of parents with their children waiting to see Santa. I sat and watched them for a while.

So, how much do you suppose a mall Santa gets paid? I know it was at least 80 degrees in that place. He had a full suit on with beard, etc. He wasn't as round as the storybook Santa. For all I know he may have started out bigger, but sweat off all the fat.

I'm pretty sure it was a guy. I didn't get close enough to hear him speak. Time after time somebody plopped a little rugrat on his lap. Most of the time they were horrified at this sight of foreign red and white monstrosity. Anyways, I'll bet he doesn't get paid near enough.

These look good

Cherries from July

I could go for a bowl of these babies right about now. I have bananas and golden delicious apples. No cherries. I closed my eyes and picked a photo from my archives. My night picture taking needs a lot of improvement. I am reading and studying up on it, though. Even with my tripod the lights are very blurry. If it warms up a little I can experiment more. As it is, the wind is biting cold and I don't have the ambition to play around with my camera outside. Brrrrr.

The incident I wrote about the other day (employees reading other's e-mails) is all over the newspapers here. Since I know the person involved and have worked with them, I am just sick to my stomach over it. Somebody with a family (two small children) has been suspended from their job. Before the holidays when life gets depressing enough. It is hard not to snoop for some people. Especially if they have a bone to pick with somebody and they want to catch them in a compromising situation. What is that old saying? "Cut off your nose to spite your face?" The meaning is, you do something rash or silly (usually in anger) that ends up backfiring and doing just as much harm to yourself (if not more). This appears to be the case.

I drove around a little bit this evening to look at Christmas lights outside people's homes. So pretty. This tradition goes way back to when we were little and used to open our gifts up on Christmas Eve. My Mom and older sister would convince us that Santa had so many gifts to deliver he needed to start early and he usually started at our house, so we got our gifts early. My oldest sister would pile us younger ones in the car and drive us around to look at Christmas light displays in the neighborhood. (Thus giving my Mom time to put the gifts out under the tree). I know that I fell for it. As I got older and began driving, I would take my Mom out for about an hour to look at lights on an evening close to Christmas. She never went out after dark when she got older, so this was a rare outing for her. We didn't go if the weather was bad.

Then I come home to my house - completely dark. I better get something done. I have a gazillion lights and stuff, but just don't have the knack for putting them up. Not very handy with the ladder and tools. I'll give it a good try tomorrow evening or this week-end. I still have time.